Sunday, November 02, 2008

pseudo-alert in india

nov 2nd, 2008

there are a number of clues to identify pseudos in india. here's my first set of clues, off the top of my head. feel free to add others.

1. anybody who says 'trope' or 'praxis' is a communist

2. anybody who pronounces 'healthy' as though it rhymes with 'haldi' (hindi for turmeric) is a convent-educated crypto-christist weenie. same with anybody who says 'flaaaaaaah' for 'flower' and 'aaaaaaaaa' for 'hour' or 'paaaaaaa' for 'power'

3. anybody who says 'till' when they actually mean 'while' is thinking in hindi and is translating on the fly into english. example: "i will not shower till i don't pass the exam' -- they're translating verbatim a hindi idiom which i don't think is present in other indian languages, and they are saying the exact opposite of what they mean. well, maybe they're not pseudos, they just have poor english and it's just hilarious.

5 comments:

Unknown said...

Is this an anti-hindi rant or an anti-pesudo one?

At a time when the Hindu society is in danger in India, this kind of writing (including your frequent anti-north articles on rediff) are not doing any good.

Do you think north Indians are dumb or not patriotic?

nizhal yoddha said...

well, i never said anything against north indians except one guy who said southerners did not participate in the freedom struggle. him i slammed for ignorance. i have even written glowingly about bihar which most of you guys look down upon.

i do have problems with hindi and its imposition. it's a monoculture, just like the imposition of semiticism on hindus. and done by the same guys, the kkkangress.

but then i have fairly similar problems with tamil imperialism as well.

let's say i don't like imperialism of any kind at all.

so don't turn this into a north v south debate. it isn't. i just find this particular habit of hindiwallahs utterly entertaining. i similarly find the 'present continuous tense' of tamils (eg. "you are having a pen?") equally entertaining. i am sure you guys find the malayali difficulty with the letters q and o entertaining.

Unknown said...

This comes from a UP ka bhaiyya (as many would like to address us). And NO this is not a north-south debate. Because this UP ka bhaiya loves Kannada language, Masala Dosai and frankly speaking doesn't see any distinction between South and North.

Please remove your bias and for once (or probably for the first time) meet the UP guy, who speaks Sanskritised Hindi, loves Mano murthy's Kannada songs and Rahman's tamil songs as much as Bengali sweets and gujrati dhokla.

Come to UP (my personal invitation), go to the villages and see for urself that how some hindi-speaking bhaiyyas are practicing Hinduism in its purest form. And yes, I am not denying that UP (or any other hindi speaking state) doesn't have issues of its own, but then its the same case with all states.

I hope you will accept the invitation, if nothing then for the sake of understanding UP-Bihar with a patriotic host (that is me).

I myself don't like imperialism of any kind. And surprise surprise, you will find many supports of "promote-sanskrit" in UP.

Sameer said...

Well, to bring the discussion back, I am adding my sets of words, which show signs of dhimmi

-All religions are equal
-terrorists have no religion
-Hindu-terrorist
-Gujarat-holocaust
-South-Asian (or Asian as with Limeys)
-Hindoo

Lets see from others...

Unknown said...

In addition to these-

"progressive"
"multiculturalism"